I think that there is a bit of a misconception that diplomats have a pretty easy life, flitting about from one cocktail party to another. The cocktail parties, to be perfectly honest, are really hard work.

When we were posted in Japan I didn’t have to go to many of these sorts of affairs since there was – and presumably still is – a very clear division between the personal and the professional realms of people’s lives. There were a few events, but mainly these were with special people whom T valued enough to allow into our lives.

India, it seems is a bit of a different story. Despite having only been here for a couple of weeks T has already received several invitations to events, and last night I had to perform my role as the +1.

Now I don’t want to come across as a grumpy old man, and while I probably will, I have gotten to the point in my life where I value the concept of time. It truly is a precious commodity. I don’t think I am particularly good at small talk, and I don’t really want to waste my time making it when I could be doing a myriad of other important things like spending time with my kids, writing my book, or sleeping (oh….sleeeeeeeep). That being said, I also don’t want to be a liability to my wife’s career. So I put on some long pants (you know it is important if I put on long pants in 30°C weather), tossed on a nice jacket, and with a sense of nervous excitement combined with impending doom off I went.

As it turned out, it wasn’t half bad.

The event was held at the Taj Palace hotel right on the waterfront in South Mumbai which is a truly majestic and spectacular building. There are a lot of negative aspects to the legacy of British colonialism, but architecture was one thing you have to give the Brits props for. The Taj was built in 1904 and over the years has been host to Princesses, Kings, and celebrities alike, and now me too. It was also the site of a terrorist attack in November 2008 which is still very much in the collective consciousness. As we walked up the stairs to the Ballroom it was pointed out where grenades were lobbed from, but at the same time I was more in awe of the architecture, the attention to detail, and the largest and most fragrant bouquets of flowers I have ever seen, which make the Taj a truly 5 star experience.

The event celebrating Canada and India’s independence days seemed a great success. While I am sure there were a few stuffed shirts in the room, the hosts were amazing and there were some absolutely wonderful people whom I had the privilege to talk with, and hope to meet again. The conversations, far from being small talk, were quite interesting and entertaining. While there were several references to our “hot bod” Prime Minister (and even the suggestion that all Canadians should all have to do that crazy yoga pose), there were some great conversations about progressive and inclusive trade, initiatives to support the role of women in India, the history of Mumbai, and some people even feigned interest in my historical research on peacekeeping and fragile states. All in all it was an enjoyable experience and, rather than feeling something akin to a root canal, I was surprised at how quickly and easily time passed.

I did, however, learn that there is a bit of an art to these events. Nursing drinks (even the non-alcoholic variety) is a valuable talent, as is the ability to balance drinks while shaking hands and exchanging business cards. One of my most important roles as a +1 for the evening was being the diplomat’s official drink holder (a role which I nailed, if I do say so myself). And despite that fact that there is food at these events, the smart thing is actually not to eat. Spitting food on people, or spilling it on oneself, it seems, is not the best way to represent one’s country.

It is also quite apparent that whether or not one is accredited as a diplomatic representative, anytime we leave our country, for good or ill, we are viewed by others as a representative of Canada. I will do my best not to screw it up for the rest of you.

M.